Tuesday, December 15, 2009

I Can Feeling It Coming In the Air Tonight

Some call it premonition...some call it E.S.P....I have to give as Divine preparation. For the past couple of days, I've been having a strange taste in my mouth. I don't know if anyone else has experienced that feeling, usually after you eat something that didn't taste too satisfactory. Well this taste has been in my mouth consistently for the past two days. Not even sweets have been able to provide a brief relief to this wretched taste. Not only that, but I also just have this unsettling feeling down in my gut (noo....its not gas, thank you very much). I really can't put my finger on what that is either. In this heightened awareness period, I can't help but think about the fact that my Father's bday is coming up on Thursday (Dec. 17th). He would have been 71.

I remember back to this time last year, my sister and I were looking for little trinkets and party objects to celebrate my Dad's 70th bday. Little did I know what the future held. My apologies for that brief digression--this all still seems to knock me down every now and then. Back to the matter at hand, could this be the reason why things just don't FEEL right? Could it be that I have caused pain to one of my friends, and it is catching up to me? I mean, last night, randomly...a truck almost took me out because a stupid decision by the driver (not paying attention to the road and the driver was talking on a cell phone...crazy new jerseyians). Again. Digression. But why do we have these feelings. What is this particular feeling telling me. When will this situation (whatever it is) just pass?

A lot of questions fill my head. Its enough to just make you live in fear if you're not careful. I was actually listening to one of the VP's at work yesterday talk about the number 1 reason business don't grow. It's because of FEAR. Fear of living outside of what they know...they're comfort zone. Kinda relevant given my situation. I've been kinda scared to know whats going to happen next with my life, so it has caused a slight depression to hit. BUT, I have made up my mind that I will not let fear control me. Whatever comes my way, I know that it is God's will, and whether I deserve it or not, its a part of His ultimate plan for my life. So I will accept it. Not only will I accept it, I will optimize on the opportunity. If you're reading this, just say a quick prayer for me and my strength. I don't know whats coming, but I'm ready....

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